Mental health articles

By the beginning of the third year the foundation is laid for the unique thinking
and feeling individual that the toddler will become. Language is established, as
are physical competence and mobility. Over this year children further develop a
sense of themselves and their place within a network of relationships. They
develop a range of words for their own emotions, and as Fonagy, Steele, Steele,
Moran and Higgitt (1991) put it, ‘children in their third year are evidently
capable of understanding that other people have feelings and intentions different
from their own’ (p. 204). Children begin to be able to manage their interaction
with others, including peers. Memory and language enable them to tolerate
longer separations and to begin to predict events. Their emerging sense of self
is evident in what is sometimes called the ‘terrible twos’, wilfulness and
possessiveness. As they continue to experiment with their own power or lack of
it, they may become ritualistic or picky about food or clothes and unpredictably
oppositional. They are now also able to be fully collaborative partners in
activities and in anticipation of events.
I notice Lara’s individuality when I take her to child care and see the enormous
range of kids there and the ways they relate to each other. Some appear to be
always cheerful, greeting others at the door and running around in a pack, while
others like Lara are more cautious and take a little longer to connect with the
group. Lara seems to need a ‘link’ in to other people—an activity, a shared
experience such as a story, or identifying something in common with another
person. I think this reflects her nature as a great observer of life, and one who
participates after careful assessment and reflection. I used to try to encourage her
to ‘leap in’ a bit more, but lately I have found that helping her find her connection
with the group by staying alongside her for a while helps much more. (Freya,
mother of Lara, two years and nine months.)The fourth year is a period of dramatic integration and reorganisation that
prepares the child for the school years. Language becomes more elaborate, as
does symbolic and imaginative play. Children become increasingly aware of
social expectations and responsibilities and their friendships strengthen and
develop. In parallel with this, there is further development of what is known as
‘theory of mind’: the capacity to know that others have thoughts and feelings
that are separate from our own (Fonagy & Target, 1996). This is intimately
linked to the later capacity for empathy and self-reflection.

Tags: infant