Why do some people beat or abuse their partners

Why do some people beat or abuse their partners?

There are no simple answers to this question. Some men beat their wife because they believe this is an acceptable way of dealing with conflict. He may have seen his father behave in a

similar way towards his mother. Violence becomes a way of keeping women ‘in their place’.

However, male domination cannot be the only reason, because violence is common even in societies where women have achieved considerable equality. In fact, men who beat their wives are

generally not aggressive in relationships outside the family.

Violence, though mostly directed against women, can also be directed against other people in the family, such as children, elders and men. In homosexual relationships, men may be violent

towards their male partner and in lesbian relationships women may be violent towards women.

Thus, an important reason for violence may be related to the nature of the close emotional relationships between people who live in families. A key issue is that of ‘power and control’. This means that if a person feels he has power or control over another, he is more likely to be violent towards that person.

You should not think that the abuser is a monster. He may be in need of help himself. The majority of women prefer to stay with their husband, even though he is violent.

Thus, working with the abusive man may be an important part of helping the woman. If you have the attitude that the man is a monster, then it makes working with him difficult. This

attitude may also make it hard for you to understand the woman’s desire to continue living with him.

Some people say that some women ‘deserve’ it when they are beaten because they are ‘loose’ or flirtatious. There is no excuse of any sort for a man to abuse a woman.